Possession
by AMayes
Summary: Continuation of "Salvation" - Set throughout various points in Eclipse. My take on what Edward was thinking, and feeling during the more memorable scenes.
1. Pages 436 to 443

_**This is a continuation of what I did with New Moon. Eclipse from Edward's POV. It follows Eclipse from pages 436 - 443. (the bedroom scene!)  
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_**Again, dialogue has been modified/omitted to suit pacing. I still felt that I was simply retyping Meyer's work. :P  
**_

_**Hope you enjoy it.**_

_**A shout out to katmom for being a great supporter! Thanks so much!  
**_

_**I don't own anything from the Twilight series.  
**_

**Possession - Part 1  
**

I heard the loud engine of Bella's truck chugging up the hill. A feeling of relief washed over me, I'd wondered if she might decide to spend this time with Jacob instead. Being unable to read her mind had never been so frustrating. Where did her heart truly lie? I wanted desperately to believe it was with me, and, so far, she'd given me no real reason to doubt that assumption.

And yet, a life with Jacob made so much more sense for her. I couldn't blame her if it turned out to be the road she chose. Although Bella repeatedly demanded to become on of us, I couldn't help but feel that she didn't have a clear view of what she'd be giving up. Friends, family, aging, and children. All the things Jacob could give her, and I couldn't. Yet so long as she wanted, I'd be hers, and she'd be mine. Never again would I leave, I didn't think I could physically do it again. It had been horrific enough the first time round, and I had no intention of putting us through a second one.

I watched as Bella guided her truck up our drive, parked, then killed the engine. I was by her side the next instant, feeling somewhat elated that she had actually come. I opened the truck door, and wound one arm around her, lifting her out. Her sweet scent assaulted my senses as I bent down to kiss her. I kicked the door shut with a deft swing of my foot, then cradled Bella, bridal style, carrying her through the doorway to my home. All this without releasing her lips from mine.

I felt her hands tangle into my hair, as her breathing quickened. Her heart was racing under her fragile skin. I loved being with her like this, especially now that none of my family members were around to interrupt, verbally or mentally. I allowed the kiss to go on for longer than usual, enjoying the feel of her warmth, and reveling in the fact she had chosen me over Jacob. Soon, the sensation of her so close to me, began to threaten my control. As much as I would've loved to continue, I knew it was much too dangerous for her.

Reluctantly, I pulled away from her, and whispered, "Welcome home," into her ear. The idea of us, sharing a home, gave me a thrill.

"That sounds nice." Bella smiled, trying to catch her breath.

I set her down, knowing my body was too hard and cold for her to be against for long. Bella quickly wound her arms around me, as if to refute my thoughts. It made me smile, knowing she loved and wanted me enough to stay by my side, no matter the danger to herself. I could only hope I was worthy of her devotion.

"I have something for you." I informed her.

"Oh?" She sounded surprised.

"Your hand-me-down, remember? You said that was allowable." The silly girl wouldn't let me give all the things I longed to.

"Oh, that's right. I guess I did say that." She sounded so put upon, I couldn't help laughing.

"It's up in my room. Shall I go get it?" I tried to suppress my eagerness. Bella laced her fingers through mine.

"Sure. Let's go."

As soon as she gave her consent, I simply scooped her up, too impatient to wait for her to climb the stairs, and raced to my bedroom. I deposited Bella at the doorway and headed to the closet to retrieve the gift. Bella situated herself in the middle of the bed, curled up into a ball, looking warily at me. You'd have thought I was about to eat her, instead of giving her a present.

"Okay, let me have it." She mumbled. I grinned, then joined her on the bed. Her heart gave a queer thump, making me wonder what had brought it on. Did she look a little flushed? I pushed the thought out of my mind. I was anxious to see what she thought of her gift.

"A hand me down." I told her, matter-of-factly. Gently, I pried her left arm away from her legs, then fastened a diamond heart directly opposite Jacob's wolf. It glimmered in the I had said was true, the heart had belonged to my mother. Bella gasped when she caught sight of it.

"It was my mother's." I shrugged, as if it were of little importance. "I inherited quite a few baubles like this. I've given some to Esme and Alice both. So, clearly, this is not a big deal in anyway."

That was also true, I had given Esme and Alice a few of my mother's things, but nothing compared to the diamond that now sparkled on Bella's wrist. That, I had saved, at my mother's insistence, for the woman I would marry. I knew Bella would be upset if I let her know how valuable it actually was, so I let her believe it was a simple crystal.

As I gazed at the heart, I smiled inwardly. _My_ diamond, and as close to wearing my ring as I figured I'd get…for now.

I had Bella nestled into my side, when I felt her heart rate pick up again. Strange, that didn't usually happen unless we were being more intimate. Was she nervous? Of all the people for my talent not to work on!

"Can we discuss something? I'd appreciate it if you would begin by being open-minded." Bella suddenly spoke up. Her words came out in a rush.

It put me on my guard. Was she going to insist I turn her now? After all the discussions we'd had about it?

"I'll give it my best effort." I replied, somewhat cautiously.

"Well, I guess, first, I wanted to talk to you about that whole ridiculous marriage condition thing." She had a look of distaste as she said the last few words. I dearly wished she wouldn't think of marriage so negatively. She had no clue as to how serious I was about wanting to marry her. I'd found my soul mate, why wait any longer?

"It's only ridiculous to you. What about it?" I asked, trying to figure out where this was leading.

"I was wondering…is that open to negotiation?" She looked at me pointedly.

Negotiation? I'd already agreed to change her, seeing as how determined she was to follow me into this existence. There wasn't anything I wouldn't do for her, but this, was one of the most difficult concessions I'd had to make. I told her as much. I was surprised she was going to demand something more, and I steeled myself for some absurd request.

"I didn't realize there was anything else you wanted besides being transformed into a monster yourself. I'm extremely curious." I kept my voice neutral, waiting for her ultimatum.

Oddly, she didn't reply. What was going on in that head of hers? Her cheeks began to flame under my gaze. While I was accustomed to this, it was an unusual moment for it to happen. I ran a finger down the smooth skin of her face. "You're blushing? Please, Bella, the suspense is painful." I was beyond curious now.

"Well, I'm a little worried about…after," She finally told me. I tensed, was she having second thoughts about being changed? Did she want to remain human? A part of me was relieved at the idea, the other part was sorely disappointed. I hated to admit it, but the idea of Bella spending eternity with me, was more than appealing. It was selfish, but I wanted to be with her, forever.

"What has you worried?" I asked, lightly.

"…I'm afraid I'll be so preoccupied with the mayhem that I won't be me anymore…and that I won't…I won't want you the same way I do now." Her cheeks were now scarlet.

I smiled inwardly. How very Bella.

"Bella, that part doesn't last forever."

"Edward, there's something I want to do before I'm not human anymore." She didn't look at me as she said this. I waited, but she stayed silent. What could she possibly want? Didn't she know I would give her the world if she asked for it? She only had to say the word.

"Whatever you want." I smiled at her, trying to make her more comfortable.

"Do you promise?" She asked.

"Yes," I said without hesitation. _I'll do anything within my power for you. _"Tell me what you want, and you can have it."

Bella continued to look unsettled; the blush still staining her cheeks. She fiddled with her bracelet, then cleared her throat.

"You." She nearly whispered. What an inane request. I already belonged to her.

"I'm yours." I said, pointing out the obvious. She met my eyes briefly before looking away again. Bella drew a long breath, threw her arms around me, bringing her mouth up to meet mine.

_What are you thinking?_ I wanted to cry. She knew I was hers already, but I kissed her willingly. _If this is what helps you believe it, I'm game_. Her lips continued to move against my own and I felt her body trembling.

Bella's hands went from my neck to the top button of my shirt. She was fumbling with it when I realized what she meant. _Anything, but that._

Being that close to Bella would only result in disaster. Her nearness, coupled with the knowledge of exactly what it was she wanted, caused a different kind of monster to awaken within me. One that I didn't want to expose her to.

It was a constant battle for me, against the two raging desires in my body. _Bella, if only you knew._

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**A/N: Too corny? The rest of that chapter, including Edward's proposal, is on deck. Review!!**


	2. Pages 443 to 450

_**This became much longer than I'd originally thought it would be. It's entertaining to be in Edward's head. :)**_

_**I'm following pages 444 - 450 from Eclipse  
**_

_**I still don't own Twilight.**_

**Possession - Part 2**

_Previously - Bella's hands went from my neck to the top button of my shirt. She was fumbling with it when I realized what she meant. Anything, but that._

I pushed her away gently.

"Be reasonable, Bella." I admonished. I'd told her numerous times why this wasn't possible.

"You promised – whatever I wanted." She protested weakly.

"We're not having this discussion." I stated with an air of finality, buttoning my shirt back up.

"I say we are." She retorted, as she worked the top button of her blouse free. It seemed the shy Bella was gone, and replaced by this surprisingly aggressive creature. Damn her for being like this, it was hard enough as it was.

I grasped her wrists, rendering her arms useless, as I pinned them to her sides. _I only have so much control, don't push me._

"I say we're not."

We glared at each other for a few moments. Then I watched Bella's expression begin to change from indignant to something else. Her blush returned, and she dropped her eyes from mine, but not before I could see the moisture building in them.

Crying, Bella was crying. I wasn't sure exactly why. She knew why I said no. She knew I wanted the same thing she did, wasn't it perfectly obvious? With a finger under her chin, I lifted her head to look at her.

"What now?"

"Nothing," She said, clearly lying. I searched her face carefully, then came to a sudden, unbelievable, conclusion. Was it possible Bella thought I didn't want her that way? That I said no because I thought she was unsuitable as a lover?

"Did I hurt your feelings?" I asked, incredulously.

"No." She replied, too quickly. I wanted to laugh at the ridiculousness of her actions. _Silly girl._ Instead, I gathered her into my arms, so that she was tight against my shoulder.

"You know why I have to say no, you know that I want you, too." I couldn't believe she needed this reassurance. I loved her, more than I'd thought possible to love anyone. For vampires the emotional went hand-in-hand with the physical. It took all the self-control I had to keep from _showing _Bella, just how much I loved her.

"Do you?" She asked, in a shaky voice.

"Of course I do, you silly, beautiful, oversensitive girl." Abruptly my mood changed, as I recalled the thoughts of numerous boys at our high school. Mike Newton's mind was particularly irritating, what with his constant longing for Bella. "Doesn't everyone? I feel like there's a line behind me, jockeying for position, waiting for me to make a big enough mistake…You're too desirable for your own good." I said that last part grimly. No one was going to get a chance, if I could help it. Not even that dog of hers.

"Tell me if I have anything wrong." Bella said. "Your demands are marriage, paying my tuition, more time, and you wouldn't mind if my vehicle went a little faster. Did I get everything? That's a hefty list." She tried to look burdened.

"Only the first is a demand." I reminded her, doing my best to keep from laughing at her expression. She was still the world's worst actress. "The others are merely requests."

"And my lone, solitary little demand is - " Bella began but I interrupted her.

"Demand?" The teasing mood completely left me. This was a demand? Bella wanted me that badly? The notion staggered me.

"Yes, demand." Bella confirmed. I frowned at her, but she continued. "Getting married is a stretch for me. I'm not giving in unless I get something in return."

I bent down to whisper into her ear. "No. It's not possible now. Later, when you're less breakable. Be patient Bella." I pleaded. _Let's get off this topic before I do something I may very well regret. _I'd meant what I said before, she was entirely too desirable for her own good.

Bella launched into an all out offensive, and she was nothing if not persuasive as she listed all the reasons why I should give in. God knows I wanted to, but I would do nothing that could potentially harm her. However, I felt my resolve begin to waver as I listened to her argument.

"Right now, physically, there's nothing I want more than you. More than food or water or oxygen. Intellectually, I have my priorities in a slightly more sensible order. But physically…" She trailed off, turned her head, and kissed the palm of my hand.

The kiss jolted me to my core, threatening my control even further. I took a breath, and was unsettled to find it sounded ragged. _You'll be the death of me._

"Bella, I could kill you." I said hoarsely, a war beginning to rage within me.

"I don't think you could." She said. I could tell she believed it. I narrowed my eyes, she knew better than that. Perhaps it was time to remind her of exactly who I was.

I reached behind me, feeling for the post of the bed, and grasped one of the roses that adorned the bedframe. I snapped it off easily, bringing it up to Bella so she could get a clear view of what I was holding. As she watched, I squeezed the metal rose, crushing it into a mashed ball. Bella glowered at me, as I pulverized the ball into sand.

"That's not what I meant. I already _know_ how strong you are. You didn't have to break the furniture."

"What _did_ you mean then?" I asked, my tone tense. I was certainly strong enough to kill her if we attempted to make love. It was dismaying that my little demonstration did nothing to quell her…enthusiasm for me. Yet, it endeared her to me even more.

"Obviously not that you aren't physically able to hurt me, if you wanted to…More that, you _don't_ want to hurt me…so much so that I don't think that you ever could." Bella explained, her eyes begged for me to agree.

"It might now work like that, Bella." I said, doubtfully, shaking my head.

"Might," she challenged. "You have no more idea what you're talking about than I do."

"Exactly. Do you imagine I would ever take that kind of risk with you?" I countered. _You mean everything to me, I won't lose you._ She stared at me for a long moment, her eyes scanning my face. Her expression turned beseeching.

"Please," she whispered. "It's all I want. Please."

Listening to her words, and feeling her warmth so close to me, was making my head whirl. Unbidden, the image of Bella, naked, and in my arms, sprung to mind. My chest tightened, and I restrained the impulse to make the image become a reality.

She opened her eyes when I didn't answer right away. It was clear she had been waiting for my final 'no.' I told myself it's what I needed to say, but I couldn't bring myself to utter the word. I could deny her nothing, but this was necessary. _I want you so badly, but it would kill you._

It seemed that my continued silence gave her hope, because she spoke again.

"Please? You don't have to make me any guarantees. If it doesn't work out right, well, then that's that. Just let us _try_…only try. And I'll give you what you want, I'll marry you. I'll let you pay for Dartmouth, and I won't complain about the bribe to get me in. You can even buy me a fast car if that makes you happy! Just…_please_."

The appeal in her eyes was almost more than I could handle. I needed her, as much as the blood I consumed to survive, she was the single most important thing to me. And she wanted me. So much that she was willing to concede to all my other requests, if only I'd give her this.

Apparently, she had a death wish. And it seemed that I was all too willing to help her down that path. Unable to resist her pull any longer, I wrapped my arms tightly around her. The scent of her further inflamed my already aroused senses. She was so warm, and so willing.

"This is unbearable. So many things I've wanted to give you – and this is what you decide to demand. Do you have any idea how painful it is, trying to refuse you when you plead with me this way?" My lips were mere inches from hers, but I refrained from kissing her. As if by doing so, I'd be able to resist her pleas.

"Then don't refuse." She breathed.

Conflicted, I strained to force my arms to push her away, and keep her safe. They stayed stubbornly around her softness, defying me.

"Please," she said again.

"Bella…" I shook my head, but negated the action by brushing my lips across the smooth skin of her throat. Her scent tantalized, and tortured me at the same time. I wanted her…badly.

Bella twisted around quickly, bringing her lips to meet mine. At the touch of her yielding mouth, the final thread of my wavering control, ripped in half. I clutched her to me, greedily, kissing her with a passion I had formerly kept under tight rein. If only she wasn't so eager, so responsive to my touch. It was impossible to deny her.

Sensation overwhelmed me as I continued to hold her mouth prisoner under mine. I was using more force than usual, as I tried to satisfy the growing fire in me. Finally, Bella had to break away, her human need for oxygen making itself known. I moved my lips to the base of her throat, unwilling, or unable to stop us from going down a dangerous road. My mind screamed at me to stop, before Bella got hurt. Unfortunately, it was my body that was in control, for once.

I felt Bella's hands at my shirt again. This time her fingers moved much more deftly down the row of buttons. I was powerless to stop her, not when it was something I wanted as desperately as she did. She succeeded in opening my shirt, and I shuddered as she ran her hands over my chest and pulled my face back down to hers. I kissed her with abandon, keeping an iron arm around her waist, crushing her as close to me as I dared.

Knowing she would surrender herself to me, was intoxicating. _Isabella Swan is mine. _I was drowning in her, and ready to give her what she wanted. It was when Bella strained against me, trying to reach for the buttons of her blouse, that reality started to sink back in. _What was I doing? I could kill her. _ I was simply too strong for her fragile, human body. Images of her flooded my mind again, only this time she was lying, broken, and bleeding from my…ministrations.

My body cried out in protest, as I seized Bella's wrists, pulling her arms above her head. Thus, effectively ending our tryst.

"Bella," I murmured into her ear, "Would you please stop trying to take your clothes off?"

"Do you want to do that part?" She queried, obviously confused. _Yes, very badly, but not now._

I firmly closed the door on the dual monsters within me.

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**A/N: The proposal is still coming! I'd originally thought to post all of it (from where I started to the proposal) as one chapter, but it was getting too long for my taste. Please review, I thrive on them!**


	3. Pages 450 to 460

_**I finally finished off the chapter! And darn if I didn't really enjoy it! I hope you do too.**_

_**Thanks to all those who've reviewed and put me on alert. Your words of encouragement keep me going!**_

_**This follows Eclipse from 450 - 460. I have omitted a fair bit of dialogue.  
**_

_**I do not own Twilight.**_

**Possession - Part 3**

Previously -

_"Bella," I murmured into her ear, "Would you please stop trying to take your clothes off?"_

_"Do you want to do that part?" She queried, obviously confused. __Yes, very badly, but not now._

"Not tonight," I said. I returned my lips to her cheek, but with an iron grasp on my control.

"Edward, don't -" She began to argue.

"I'm not saying no, I'm just saying not tonight." I told her.

"Give me one good reason why tonight is not as good as any other night." She demanded.

With my sanity returning, I was able to think more clearly. I didn't want to tell her that tonight had nearly happened. Instead I came up with, an equally valid, reason for stopping. I just hadn't thought of it during the heat of the moment.

"I wasn't born yesterday," I said, with a laugh. "Out of the two of us, which do you think is more unwilling to give the other what they want? You just promised to marry me before you do any changing, but if I give in tonight, what guarantee do I have that you won't go running off to Carlisle in the morning?" I didn't truly believe she would go 'running off to Carlisle', I knew how important it was to Bella, that I be the one to change her. Truth be told, it was important to me to, seeing as how she was bound and determined to become one of us. This condition seemed a good way to get her to agree to the idea of marriage.

Now, with my head clearing from the passion-induced fog, I was shocked by my response to Bella's 'request', I hadn't felt anything like that before, not in all my hundred plus years on this Earth. It was unsettling, partly because I had been so ready to throw caution to the proverbial wind, and partly because this isn't how I had been raised. I had lived in the early 1900s, in a time when men and women waited until marriage, to consummate their love.

I realized today's world operated differently. People didn't think that way anymore. I, on the other hand, was still a product of my era, old-fashioned if you will. I was glad I had stopped us. I wanted to do right by Bella, just as I would have, had we met when I was still human.

Esme had always called me a perfect gentleman. My mouth twisted into a wry smile. Apparently the 'perfect gentleman' had been all too willing to throw the title out the window. Not that I didn't have good reason to.

"I have to marry you first?" Bella grimaced.

"That's the deal – take it or leave it. Compromise, remember?" _Damn it Bella, I will make you mine, one way or another. _I began to kiss her, as deeply as I dared, knowing the effect it had on her. I heard her heart rate increase, and smiled against her lips. It wasn't the fairest of tactics, but desperate times called for desperate measures.

"I think that's a really bad idea." She managed to say, when I released her.

"I'm not surprised you feel that way, you have a one-track mind." _And I secretly love it._

"How did this happen? I thought I was holding my own tonight – for once – and now, all of a sudden -"

"You're engaged." I cut her off, seeing that she didn't want to say the word. That one word made my heart soar. Bella was engaged, to me. My heart's desire had finally agreed to marry me. Albeit, by rather unconventional means. It didn't matter, so long as I had her. After a century of solitude, I'd, at long last, met my better half.

"Ew! _Please_ don't say that out loud." Bella pulled a face.

"Are you going back on your word?" I asked, mischievously. I knew Bella, she didn't go back on her promises. She was _mine_. When she only glared at me, I pressed the question. "Are you?"

"Ugh! No. I'm not. Are you happy now?" She huffed.

"Exceptionally." I couldn't help the wide smile that stretched across my face. I was so euphoric, I only half-listened to what she was saying, until a few choice words pulled my attention back to her.

"…So there's really no reason to wait. We're completely alone – how often does that happen? – and you've provided this very large and comfortable bed…"

It was beyond tempting, but both my rational side, and the gentleman in me, refused the idea.

"Not tonight."

"Don't you trust me?"

"Of course I do." _I just don't trust me_.

"Then what's the problem? It's not like you didn't know you were going to win in the end." Her brows furrowed then. "You always win."

"Just hedging my bets." I said, casually.

"There's something else," her expression turned scrutinizing, "Are you planning to go back on your word?"

"No," I said sincerely, "I swear to you, we _will_ try. After you marry me." _Let me do this the right way, Bella, you deserve to be treated like a queen._

"You make me feel like a villain in a melodrama – twirling my mustache while I try to steal some poor girl's virtue." She said scornfully. I glanced at her, she was closer to the truth than she thought. I tried to distract her by pressing my lips against the base of her throat.

It didn't work this time.

"That's it, isn't it?" Bella was shocked. "You're trying to protect your virtue!" She covered her mouth, to try and stifle her giggles.

I grit my teeth. Laughing at me was definitely not going to get her what she wanted. What was really so wrong with wanting to wait? She had my promise we'd try, and I never broke a promise.

"No, silly girl. I'm trying to protect yours. And you're making it shockingly difficult."

The conversation segued into a discussion of mortality and values. She insisted I had a soul, though I was still doubtful. I knew I had no right to even entertain the idea of marrying her, I was only damning her with me. Bella was my greatest source of strength, and my greatest weakness.

Even if she didn't like it, Bella eventually came to realize why it was important me that we be married first. Though the knowledge didn't keep her from grumbling about it.

"I can't believe I'm going along with this. When I think of Charlie…and Renee! Can you imagine what Angela will think? Or Jessica? Ugh, I can hear the gossip now." She rambled on, but stopped when I raised an eyebrow at her. Who cared what those paltry minds thought? Those children didn't know what love was. They didn't know the unbreakable connection Bella and I shared.

"It doesn't have to be a big production. I don't need any fanfare. I just want it to be official – that you belong to me and _no one else_." I told her.

"It couldn't be any more official than it already is." She muttered. _In your mind, but without this, Jacob will never give up._

"We'll see about that." I said, somewhat ambiguously. "I suppose you don't want your ring now?" I worked hard, to keep the excitement out of my voice.

"You suppose correctly." She informed me.

"That's fine. I'll get it on your finger soon enough." _Besides, I already have a diamond on you._

"You talk like you already have one." She said, suspiciously.

"I do, ready to force upon you at the first sign of weakness." I wasn't kidding. I couldn't wait to have her wear my ring.

"You're unbelievable."

"Do you want to see it?" I asked, eagerness plain in my tone.

"No!" She practically shouted. I was taken aback, was it really such a terrible thing to have an engagement ring? It seemed I'd underestimated her dislike of marriage. My face must've shown my disappointment, because Bella added, "Unless you really want to show it to me."

"That's all right, it can wait." I forced the words out of my mouth. It was increasingly difficult to act like I didn't care.

"Show me the damn ring, Edward." She sighed.

"No." There was no way I would force it on her. I wanted her to be comfortable with it, not feel like it was a burden to carry.

"Please? Please can I see it?" Her voice was soft. She reached out to lightly caress my cheek with the tips of her fingers, effectively dissolving my resolve. _The little minx_. She knows I can't refuse her.

"You are the most dangerous creature I've ever met." I threw at her, as I got up to fetch the ring from the bedside table. I always kept it close by. Occasionally, I'd open the box and imagine how the ring would look on Bella's finger. I could hardly wait to see it in reality.

"Go ahead and look then." I told her, rather curtly, as I placed the box on her knee. Bella picked up the box gingerly, as if she were afraid it would burn her. I felt like I was soon going to explode with anticipation.

"You didn't spend a lot of money, did you? Lie to me, if you did." She said.

"I didn't spend anything. It's just another hand-me-down. This is the ring my father gave to my mother." I assured her. It was true, and it had been my mother's wish for me to bestow it on my future wife.

"Oh." Bella seemed surprised. I watched her closely, as she opened the lid of the box. She stared at the ring, nestled in the satin. Then she raised her hand, to stroke the ring gently. "It's so pretty." She murmured.

"Do you like it?" I asked, anxious to know if it was suitable to her.

"It's beautiful, what's not to like?" Being the awful actress she was, it was easy to see through her studied nonchalance.

"See if it fits." I told her, restraining myself from grabbing her hand, and putting the ring on her myself.

Bella stiffened, her left hand unconsciously clenched into a tight fist.

"Bella, I'm not going to solder it to your finger. Just try it on so I can see if it needs to be sized. Then you can take it right off." I fought to keep the words I really wanted to say down. I wanted to put the ring on her, and have it stay there forever.

"Fine." She grudgingly agreed. I was going to let her put the ring on herself, but I couldn't hold back any longer. I plucked the ring from its box and slid it down her third finger. Together, we looked at her outstretched hand, to see the full effect. The ring sparkled radiantly against Bella's pale skin.

It was perfect. My ring, on the woman I loved. The symbolism of it caused a deep joy to grow within me, until it seemed I would burst with happiness.

"A perfect fit. That's nice – saves me a trip to the jeweler's." I said, straining to sound indifferent, and keep my emotions under control. Aside from our earlier interlude, I'd never fought so hard to keep my feelings at bay. I didn't want to scare her.

"You like that, don't you?" Bella asked, waving her ring-adorned left hand in front of me.

"Sure. It looks very nice on you." I hoped I sounded casual enough to fool her. Bella caught my gaze, and looked deep into my eyes. It was all I needed for my façade to break. Finally, I let the elation I was battling suffuse me completely.

_Bella Swan was wearing my ring. She was going to be entirely mine._

I didn't know how my face looked, but if Bella's reaction was any indication, the intense bliss had accentuated my already sharpened features. Her breath caught as I leaned in to kiss her. It was a kiss of joy and triumph. At this moment it didn't matter that I was a vampire, and she human. I didn't even feel like a vampire, nor could Bella's scent touch me in this instant.

I was merely a man in love, worshiping his beloved. I continued the kiss, enjoying the sensation of her mouth moving sweetly under mine. The passion I'd quashed earlier, began to creep back. The effect Bella had on my body always surprised me. I kept a firm grip on my emotions, unwilling to let myself slip again. When I sensed she needed air, I drew back. I found myself breathing almost as raggedly as Bella was.

"Yes, I like it. You have _no_ idea." I whispered in her ear.

"I believe you." Bella said, giving a shaky laugh.

"Do you mind if I do something?" I asked, pulling her closer to me. With all our discussions, I hadn't had the chance to propose properly.

"Anything you want." She consented, readily.

I slid away from her, and off the bed, then pulled her up to face me.

"Now, I want to do this right. Please, please, keep in mind that you've already agreed to this, and don't ruin it for me." I said to her, in a serious tone. I bent down onto one knee, and looked up at her.

"Oh, no." Bella groaned.

"Be nice." I chided. _Let me cherish you, the way I've longed to, the way you deserve to be adored. _"Isabella Swan, I promise to love you forever – every single day of forever. Will you marry me?" Human men often said the same thing, and thought they meant it. I was a vampire, my emotions set in stone. Even if Bella, one day, realized I wasn't good enough for her, I would love her. She'd be in my heart for the rest of my endless existence.

"Yes." She said, her love for me clearly showing on her face.

"Thank you." I said reverently. I took her left hand, and paid homage to each of her fingers with my lips, then I kissed the ring she now wore.

I could hardly believe that this amazing, loving girl had agreed to be mine.

_Thank you, _I sent up to heavens above_, I know I'm not worthy, but thank you for sending her into my life._

_

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_**A/N: I wasn't sure about some of this. A little too gooey? Not as Edward-like? Let me know what you think. Next up, Edward's version of "Fire and Ice"  
**


	4. Pages 485 to 491

_**Hello again, how about the quick updates? I am having too much fun writing this! **_

_**This time I'm following pages 485 - 491 from Eclipse. The "Fire and Ice" chapter.**_

_**I mislabeled my last chapter, it was only supposed to go up to 460, oops!**_

_**Again thanks to reviewers, you have all been so amazingly sweet with your encouragement!  
**_

_**I don't own Twilight or anything related to it.**_

**Possession - Part 4**

I was restlessly pacing, waiting for Bella and Jacob to materialize at the peak of the mountain. Why did humans take so long to do anything? I swore that if Jacob tried anything on her again, I would gladly rip him to pieces. This was a part of the plan I absolutely loathed. For one thing, I was separated from Bella, and for another, she was with Jacob. I knew he wouldn't hurt her, but I also knew he wasn't above trying to take advantage of her generous nature.

I caught sight of them trekking up the hill, with Bella huddled against Jacob's huge frame. It was starting to snow, making me worry for Bella's safety. Perhaps I hadn't planned this out as well as I initially thought.

"Bella!" I called out, relieved to see her. I ran to her side, grabbing her in a tight hug. She was in one piece; Jacob had done his job. I quickly scanned his thoughts. He hadn't tried to assault her again.

"Thank you, that was quicker than I expected, and I truly appreciate it." I said to Jacob, over Bella's head. I was speaking the truth, he had protected her, as I knew he would. He wouldn't intentionally hurt her, he loved her too. Though the thought made me clench my jaw.

"Get her inside. This is going to be bad – my hair's standing up on my scalp. Is that tent secure?" Jacob asked, looking over as the wind whipped at the sides of the tent. I followed his gaze, feeling uneasy. It didn't look like enough of a shelter in this weather. _Does he really think this will work?_ I heard Jacob's last, unvoiced, thought.

"I all but welded it to the rock." I told him.

"Good." Jacob then glanced up at the darkening sky. "I'm going to change, I want to know what's going on back home." Without any delay, he took off into the forest.

Bella was shaking in the fierce wind, so I hastened to get her into the tent. She breathed a sigh of relief, to be out of the gusts. I started to really doubt the wisdom of this plan. I could tell the temperature was dropping steadily. Even with all the layers Bella was wearing, plus the sleeping bag, I didn't think she'd be able to keep warm. I was certainly going to be of no help in that department.

The tent sides dipped in as the wind howled outside. I ran a hand through my hair, wondering if I should just pick her up and take her back down the mountain. It seemed that the weather was posing just as much a threat to Bella as Victoria was.

Bella was reaching for my hand, but I kept it out of her grasp.

"I want to be close to you Bella, but it isn't wise in this situation. I'm only going to make you colder. Why don't you get into the sleeping bag? Start warming it up." I suggested, rolling it out for her.

Bella, surprisingly, didn't protest, but obediently got into the bag, shoes and all. She inched down into the down bag, covering up as much of herself as possible. She looked up at me and smiled.

"Don't look so worried, Edward. It'll be all right. We're together, and that's what matters to me." She said. I tried to smile back, but the severity of our predicament was weighing heavily on me.

Conversation was occasional, interrupted by the winds tearing at the tent. I could see Bella was trembling underneath the covers of the sleeping bag, despite her attempts to hide her discomfort. I reluctantly moved away from her, knowing I was only contributing to the problem.

As the evening wore on, the temperature continued to plummet and Bella shook harder. I was now as far from her as possible, in a corner of the tent, watching her anxiously. Her face was ghostly pale, and she was unable to keep her teeth from chattering.

"Bella, let's go back down the mountain. This is crazy, I won't lose you to the cold." I tried to convince her to leave.

"No! I'll be fine. We're not going anywhere." She said vehemently, glowering at me, with what strength she had left.

So we stayed in the tent, and I watched my fiancée deteriorate. The sun had long since gone down, taking what little warmth it had provided with it. I attempted to persuade her to leave the mountain on several more occasions, but was met with firm resistance each time.

"It'll be even colder outside." She reasoned on my seventh attempt. I couldn't deny that, but the situation was becoming dire. She was going to freeze to death at this rate.

_Idiot, you should just take her and the hell with what she thinks, _I berated myself. I was torn about what to do. Bella was right, it was even colder outside. I didn't know if she'd survive the trip back down, even with my super-human speed. The feeling of utter helplessness was unfamiliar, and thus, created more tension within me. If only I wasn't a vampire, none of this would be happening, and Bella would be safe. I sat, questioning my judgment, alternately staring at Bella, then listening to the winds. _This was supposed to keep her out of danger, not create more_, I mused, bitterly.

"W-w-w-what time is it?" Bella chattered out at one point.

"Two." I replied, hating the way she was struggling to even talk. "Maybe…"

"No, I'm f-f-f-fine, really. I don't w-w-want to go outside."

We'd been in this godforsaken tent for over 5 hours now, would the conflict be over yet? Frustration attacked me from all sides. Bella was slowly freezing to death in front of my eyes, I had no idea how my family was faring, and the weather was getting worse.

"What can I do?" I asked her, feeling completely inept. Bella didn't respond, and only shook her head at me.

Outside we heard Jacob whine. _What are you subjecting her to in there, leech? You still think she's better off with you, freezing to death, than with me? _He'd returned about an hour ago, and was sitting, unhappily, outside, in his wolf form._ She doesn't sound too good. _There was no mistaking the concern in his mental tone.

"G-get out of h-h-here." Bella tried to order him.

"He's just worried about you." I said. "He's fine, _his_ body is equipped to deal with this."

_Goddamn it, vampire, she's going to die if she doesn't get some help. Can't you see how cold she is? She's not like you, in case you've forgotten. _Jacob's tone was started to turn from worried, to scathing.

"What do you want me to do? Carry her through that? I don't see you making yourself useful. Why don't you go fetch a space heater or something?" I muttered, angry at both him and myself. Everything he said was too true.

"I'm ok-k-kay." Bella protested.

_Seriously Edward, Bella will die unless she warms up. You'll hate it but I have an idea. My body never cools down…_ I grimaced as Jacob's voice turned slightly smug. _I'm the perfect device to warm her up. _He howled with the wind, for good effect.

"That was hardly necessary, and that's the worst idea I've ever heard." I raised my voice, to make sure he heard me. It was the worst idea, but at the same time, it would work and Bella would be safe. My entire being revolted at the thought of Jacob so close to Bella.

"Better than anything you've come up with." Jacob's human voice sounded. "Go fetch a space heater, I'm not a St. Bernard." He grumbled.

The tent door opened, and Jacob squeezed through the smallest opening he could manage, holding a parka in his hand. The little wind that came in with him, caused Bella to shudder uncontrollably.

_She looks even worse than I thought she would. Stupid leech, couldn't even manage this properly. What did he think would happen way up here? Well, the best way to warm someone up is to get naked with them_. Jacob glanced at me, smirking.

"I don't like this," I hissed at him, suddenly hating my vampire talent. "Just give her the coat and get out."

"W-w-w-" Bella stuttered.

"The parka's for tomorrow – she's too cold to warm it up by herself. It's frozen. You said she needed a space heater, and here I am." Jacob spread his arms out, he was wearing only a pair of sweats and a t-shirt. _Afraid of a little competition blood-sucker? _He challenged.

"J-J-Jake, you'll f-f-freeze," Bella said. Typical, worried about someone else when she was clearly the worst off of the three of us.

"Not me, I run at a toasty one-oh-eight point nine these days. I'll have you sweating in no time." _In more ways than one, if you'd let me._ He added, eying Bella's form in the sleeping bag.

I let out a fierce snarl, but Jacob blithely ignored me. _Sorry leech, this is what she needs. Even you can't deny that._

Fury washed over me, and, without thinking, I was up and had his shoulder in a death grip. Jacob tensed, changing his stance to match mine.

"Get your hand off of me." Jacob spat.

"Keep your hands off of her," I commanded, struggling to control my anger.

"D-d-d-don't f-f-f-fight!" Bella's broken voice called out. It stilled the both of us.

"I'm sure she'll thank you for this when her toes turn black and drop off." Jacob threw at me. _Do you want her to die Edward?_

The use of my first name, made me hesitate. He was right, she would die. As much as I hated the idea, it was best for her right now.

"Watch yourself." I said darkly, as I went back to the corner of the tent. Jacob merely laughed, making me seethe.

"Scoot over, Bella," he said, as he pulled the zipper of the sleeping bag down. _I've wanted to do this for so long, but I didn't imagine it happening this way, _Jacob's thought was grim.

"N-n-n-n-" Bella tried to say, once she realized what Jacob's intentions were.

"Don't be stupid, don't you like having ten toes?" He asked, growing impatient with her stubbornness. _Yeesh, you'd think I was trying to kill her or something._

I watched, with my fists balled up, as Jacob slid into the sleeping bag next to her. He closed the bag behind himself. _Wow, but she's like an ice cube!_ He involuntarily exclaimed.

"Jeez, you're freezing Bella." He grumbled. _You, of all people, let her get this bad?_ I swallowed the unspoken jibe, I couldn't believe I'd let it get that bad, myself.

"S-s-s-sorry." Bella chattered.

"Try to relax, you'll be warm in a minute. Of course, you'd warm up faster if you took your clothes off."

The mental picture that formed in his mind then had me up in arms. It was painful enough knowing that he could help her, when I couldn't. It was beyond agonizing to watch the both of them in the sleeping bag. I didn't need Jacob's wild fantasies added to the mix.

I growled then, wanting nothing more than to tear off his limbs.

_That's as close as you'll ever get to her, dog. She's mine, and I am hers. _

_

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_**A/N: I'm going to be finishing off that chapter, so don't fear! It was starting to get too long again. Thanks for reading!**_  
_


	5. Pages 491 to 505

**This will likely be the last of the quick updates as I go back to work tomorrow. **

**Thanks for all the love with this story. It really does instill confidence!**

**I've done quite a bit of paraphrasing in this installment. Hope it's ok.**

**Follows Eclipse pages 491 - 505 (end of "Fire and Ice")**

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**Possession - Part 5**

Previously: 

__

"Try to relax, you'll be warm in a minute. Of course, you'd warm up faster if you took your clothes off."

The mental picture that formed in his mind then had me up in arms. It was painful enough knowing that he could help her, when I couldn't. It was beyond agonizing to watch the both of them in the sleeping bag. I didn't need Jacob's wild fantasies added to the mix.

I growled then, wanting nothing more than to tear off his limbs.

That's as close as you'll ever get to her, dog. She's mine, and I am hers.

************

"That's just a simple fact, survival one-oh-one." Jacob said, defensively. Apparently, my growl had been more aggressive than I thought.

"C-c-cut it out, Jake," Bella said, irritated. "N-nobody needs all ten t-t-toes."

"Don't worry about the bloodsucker, he's just jealous." _Aren't you? Seeing as how I can save Bella, when you can't?_ Jacob was now openly taunting me.

"Of course I am. You don't have the faintest idea how much I wish I could do what you're doing for her, mongrel." There wasn't any point in getting myself into a fury again, it didn't do anything but upset Bella.

"Those are the breaks," Jacob was still smug, but his tone changed to one of bitterness, "At least you know she wishes it was you." _Despite telling her what a danger you are. It's just not natural._

"True." I noticed that Bella's shaking had slowed down considerably. I might hate it, but Jacob was helping her. There was no point to her suffering if it could be stopped.

"There, feeling better?" Jacob sounded happy with himself.

"Yes." Bella replied, her voice finally back to normal, I noted gratefully.

"Your lips are still blue," Jacob pointed out, "Want me to warm those up for you, too? You only have to ask." _I'll make sure it's a better kiss than the last time. One of these days, you'll figure out my love isn't all one-sided. _

I sighed when I heard those thoughts. I truly had no idea what Bella felt for Jacob, sometimes I wasn't sure if she knew herself. I wasn't an idiot, I knew it had to be something slightly more than friendship. She wouldn't try to conceal the visits from me if it was purely platonic. Was Jacob right? Did Bella feel more for him than even she knew?

"Behave yourself," I heard Bella mutter to Jacob. I could see her becoming drowsy as the warmth of Jacob's body enveloped her. She was exhausted from the day and fighting the cold.

"That's right, honey, go to sleep," Jacob murmured into Bella's ear.

Another consciousness impinged itself on my mind, _Whew, it's awful up here. Everything all right in there?_ I heard Seth's voice both in his own mind, and then in an echo from Jacob's.

_We're fine. I'm making sure Bella doesn't freeze to death, _Jacob replied.

_Oi, must make for some fun times in there, _came Seth's dry rejoinder. I smiled despite myself.

The tent fell silent for a time, and I did my best to stay out of Jacob's head. Unfortunately, he began broadcasting thoughts that made my stomach knot. He was ardently wishing they were alone, imagining what it would be like to peel off her clothes, to feel her naked skin against his…

I grasped one of the tent poles, digging my fingers into it. I stopped short of grinding it to dust.

"_Please!_" I said, tightly. "Do you _mind_!"

"What?" Jacob sounded genuinely surprised.

"Do you think you could _attempt_ to control your thoughts?" I was having a hard time controlling the anger that pulsed throughout me.

"No one said you had to listen," Jacob defended. "Get out of my head." _If you'd just stay out of there, you wouldn't hear things you don't like, leech. My thoughts are none of your business._

"I wish I _could_. You have no idea how loud your little fantasies are. It's like you're shouting them at me." I spat.

"I'll try to keep it down," Sarcasm dripped from his words. _I wonder, does it bother him that I can hold her like this, without worrying about crushing her?_

"Yes, I'm jealous of that too." I figured I might as well be honest. Anyone would be able to see the truth of that.

"I figured it was like that, sort of evens the playing field up a little, doesn't it?"

"In your dreams." I laughed a little. Jacob had no idea how hard it was to be physical with Bella, both because of my strength and her persistence. Yet, he didn't know about the bond we shared. The overwhelming love I felt for her, and would feel until the day I perished.

"You know, she could still change her mind. Considering _all_ the things I could do with her that you can't. At least, not without killing her, that is." _Put that in your pipe and smoke it. _ I chuckled to myself again. Jacob was irritating, but he fought like a child. He was out of league when it came to bantering.

"Go to sleep, Jacob. You're starting to get on my nerves." I said quietly.

"I think I will. I'm really very comfortable."

I decided not to answer, I didn't want to get into the discussion he seemed to want. Jacob's thoughts took a different turn then, the rancor went out, and was replaced by frank curiosity. _That vampire can hear every damn thing I'm thinking. It isn't fair. Wonder if he'd tell, if I asked._

"Maybe I would," I spoke up. Without the constant taunting, conversation between us seemed a natural thing. Much as I loathed it, he loved Bella too. We were united in that one aspect.

"But would you be honest?"

"You can always ask and see."

"Well, you see inside my head – let me see inside yours tonight, it's only fair," Jacob tone turned plaintive. I tried scanning through his thoughts but there were simply too many things he wanted to know for me to be able to sift through properly.

"Your head is full of questions. Which one do you want me to answer?"

"The jealousy…it _has_ to be eating at you. You can't be as sure of yourself as you seem. Unless you have no emotions at all." _Stone cold inside and out, how can someone like you love Bella half as much as I do? _Moronic mutt, he truly had no clue. I'd been to hell and back again because of my love for Bella. How dare he make light of it?

"Of course it is. Right now it's so bad that I can barely control my voice. Of course, it's even worse when she's away from me, with you, and I can't see her." I'd detested the time Bella spent with him. It was less time I had with her, but it was what she wanted.

"Do you think about it all the time? Does it make it hard to concentrate when she's not with you?" Jacob asked.

"Yes and no. My mind doesn't work quite the same as yours. I can think of many more things at one time. Of course, that means that I'm always able to think of you, always able to wonder if that's where her mind is, when she's quiet and thoughtful."

Countless times I'd been in a frenzy to know what Bella was thinking. Before I'd left, I'd enjoyed the silent times, it was a pleasure to watch her when she was lost deep in thought. Now, I constantly wondered if her thoughts strayed to that dog.

_I'll bet my life that Bella thinks about me. How does that make you feel?_

"Yes, I would guess that she thinks about you often. More often than I'd like. She worries that you're unhappy. Not that you don't know that. Not that you don't use that." The last words came out somewhat resentfully. The way he manipulated her was a downright crime.

"I have to use whatever I can," Jacob said. "I'm not working with your advantages – advantages like her knowing she's in love with you."

"That helps." I said, without much emotion. I tried to imagine how it would feel if I loved Bella, but she didn't love me back. Life would be unbearably bleak. It must be how Jacob felt. If he wasn't so damn irritating, I might've felt sorry for him.

"She's in love with me, too, you know." Jacob looked directly at me, his black eyes boring into my own. I met his gaze evenly, but didn't respond. What could I say to that? He could very well be right, but I certainly didn't want to admit it. Jacob deflated a little, "But she doesn't know it."

"I can't tell if you're right."

"Does that bother you? Do you wish you could see what she's thinking, too?" Jacob wanted to know. _You have too much on me as it is, bloodsucker, it's nice to think there are some things you can't do._

"Yes…and no, again. She likes it better this way, and, though it sometimes drives me insane, I'd rather she was happy." He didn't need to know how maddening it was that Bella's mind alone was closed off to me. The one being whose thoughts I longed to know, was as silent as a wall.

A strong gust whipped at the tent, causing it to shake and rattle. I saw Jacob's arms instinctively clutch Bella closer. I closed my eyes for a moment, reminding myself that, without him, Bella would be in grave danger.

"Thank you," I said softly. "Odd as this might sound, I suppose I'm glad you're here, Jacob."

_Damn righteous vampire_. Jacob rumbled grudgingly. _I can't fault his manners_.

"You mean, 'as much as I'd love to kill you, I'm glad she's warm,' right?"

"It's an uncomfortable truce, isn't it?"

"I knew you were just as crazy jealous as I am." Jacob sounded triumphant.

"I'm not such a fool as to wear it on my sleeve like you do. It doesn't help your case you know."

"You have more patience than I do."

"I should. I've had a hundred years to gain it. A hundred years of waiting for her."

My gaze went to Bella then, who appeared to be sleeping. I'd been waiting for her without even realizing it. I couldn't have guessed that this human would affect me so deeply. To me, she was beyond beautiful. The day she'd confessed she loved me had been one of the best of my life. If she chose to go with Jacob, I would let her go. It wouldn't do to make her suffer more, if I wasn't what she ultimately wanted. Despair washed over me, as I envisioned Bella's life with Jacob. It would be a better choice, but she wanted me. I would stay by her side, until she no longer needed me.

_A hundred years of waiting,_ Jacob mused, _I hadn't thought of it that way. He'd have to have patience after all that._

Jacob kept on with posing questions about hypothetical situations. I answered as best I could, in a sense he was right, I owed it to him to let him know some of my thoughts. Then he asked the question which I knew would come, but still didn't know how to handle.

"What is it like? Losing her? When you thought that you'd lost her forever? How did you…cope?" Jacob's voice was completely serious, with no jeer in it at all.

"That's very difficult for me to talk about." I said, wondering how to address this. Jacob waited, expectantly, again without any additional snide comments.

It was painful to talk about, the memory of Bella's face when I left her, was forever burned into my mind. How foolish I had been to think she would so easily forget me. The agony when she swallowed my lie about not wanting her so easily. I told Jacob as much, how I found I couldn't stay away. It was impossible to be away from your life source. It had been doubly painful to see how desperately unhappy she had been; to the point where she would indulge in dangerous activities simply to hear my voice in her subconscious.

I told him about my never-ending guilt over the way she still hated it when I left, even if was merely to hunt. It was a miracle she had forgiven me as quickly as she had. I didn't deserve her, and yet, she had chosen me.

I spoke of wanting to keep Bella alive, keep her human. She was the one who refused that option. She had an irrational fear of growing older, while I remained seventeen. No matter how many times I reassured her that it wouldn't matter, that she'd always be the single most beautiful thing in my life.

After I finished speaking, Jacob's thoughts were in turmoil. He was trying to reconcile his original impression of me, to the one I now presented: a man in love, who wanted what was best for Bella.

"You know exactly how much I hate to accept this, but I can see that you do love her…in your own way. I can't argue with that anymore. Given that, I don't think you should give up on the first alternative, not yet. You know…if you'd waited another six months to check on her…Well, you might have found her reasonably happy. I had a game plan." _You had to come back and ruin it. She could've loved me, I know it. _

Searching Jacob's mind I found that his plan had been to be patient. Let her know he would be there for her, be her shoulder to cry on, and hope that their close friendship would eventually blossom into a romance. Considering his behaviour since my return, his initial plan was quite a show of gentlemanly conduct. I had to laugh at the contrast.

"Maybe it would have worked. It was a well thought-out plan." I conceded.

"Yeah, but…give me a year, bl – Edward. I really think I could make her happy. She could be human, with Charlie and Renee, and she could grow up, and have kids, and…be Bella. Can you consider the idea that I might be better for her than you are?" Jacob's words came out in a rush, as if he thought that if he said it quickly enough, I would agree.

Jacob, he was still such a child; to think I hadn't thought it all out. That I hadn't gone through it millions of times in my head. In the end it had come down to what made Bella happy. For now, it was me, and becoming like me. Nothing else mattered except her well-being. Since she had decided I was what made her happy, then I wouldn't leave.

"I'm not stupid enough to make the same mistake I made before, Jacob. I won't try and force her into that first option again. As long as she wants me, I'm here."

Jacob wasn't surprised by my response. He knew I wouldn't leave, despite what he had said.

"Well, you've been much more honest than I had any right to expect…Edward. Thanks for letting me in your head." He said.

"As I said, I'm feeling oddly grateful for your presence in her life tonight. It was the least I could do…You know, Jacob, if it weren't for the fact that we're natural enemies and that you're also trying to steal away the reason for my existence, I might actually like you." I gave a small smile to the wolf. Jacob snorted.

"Maybe…if you weren't a disgusting vampire who was planning to suck the life of the girl I love…well, no, not even then." _I can't stand the idea of Bella becoming cold and hard like them. If only she would choose me, life would be perfect. I wish she'd come to her senses and see she DOES love me. Why else would she bother coming to see me at all? _Jacob's musings and our conversation eventually drifted off, as sleep claimed him as well.

I hummed to myself, in an effort to stay out of Jacob's head and dreams. I'd had enough drama to last me several lifetimes. As was usual, my thoughts turned to Bella. I had told Jacob his jealousy was too obvious, and a turn off to Bella. This night, when only the wind made any noise, I ventured to plead,

"Stay with me, Bella. Losing you would be more than I could take," I whispered into the darkness.

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**A/N: I'm planning on writing chapter 27, "Needs" for sure. Does anyone have other requests? I'm pretty open to suggestions!**


	6. Pages 506 to 514

**Hello out there! This is the sixth installment, following pages 506 - 514 of Eclipse.**

**Thanks to all who've taken the time to review. You are great!**

**I do not own Twilight.**

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**Possession – Part 6**

Morning finally arrived, and with it, the end of a rather harrowing and unpleasant night. Jacob's dreams had been too lucid and Bella-filled for my taste. The dreams, combined with the fact he was nestled up to her in a sleeping bag made for one of the worst nights of my life.

I watched as the rising sun lighted the inside of the tent. Bella was still sleeping, with Jacob's arm wrapped possessively around her. He hadn't let go the entire night, much to my dismay. Unfortunately he was also the one thing that kept her alive through the icy cold.

Once Jacob had fallen asleep, I had been left to my own devices. While it was a favourite pastime of mine to watch Bella sleep, it was pure torture to see the obvious delight Jacob took in being able to help Bella, when I couldn't. The thought still rankled my soul. I wanted to be the one Bella turned to, and in this instance, she had to turn away.

Eventually, Bella moved, away from Jacob's body. He responded to this by sighing and pulling her closer. Seeing that she wasn't making any progress, Bella raised her head to meet my gaze. I kept my face bland, hoping the expression made it to my eyes. From the way her face fell, I could tell I wasn't successful.

"Is it any warmer out there?" She asked in a low voice.

"Yes. I don't think the space heater will be necessary today," I commented, wryly. Bella struggled against Jacob's hold, to no avail.

"Some help?" She pleaded.

"Did you want me to take his arms all the way off?" I inquired, looking at Jacob's still form, cradled against her.

"No, thank you. Just get me free. I'm going to get heat stroke." Bella said, continuing to squirm fruitlessly to free herself from Jacob's grasp.

I quickly unzipped the sleeping bag, more than happy to comply with Bella's request. I'd had enough of looking at the dog and Bella together. It was all I could do to keep from mauling him, and I would have if Bella hadn't needed him to keep warm. Jacob's body fell unceremoniously to the cold floor of the tent. He flinched automatically.

"Hey!" He cried, then rolled on top of Bella. My eyes narrowed. He was doing it on purpose, he had to be. His thoughts were a jumbled mess, but I didn't let that stop me from grabbing him roughly, then tossing him back into the tent. Jacob hit a pole, causing the tent to shake dangerously under his weight. _That's it, you've asked for it now, leech._

Immediately he assumed an attack position, and I did the same. Both of us were crouched in front of each other, our mutual hatred making itself known. I snarled angrily at the wolf, who growled in response. I could hear Seth outside, echoing Jacob's growls. I was more than ready to pounce on Jacob. He'd tried my patience once too many times. It would be a relief to have him out of our lives for good…

"Stop it, stop it!" Bella shouted, putting herself between us. I was worried Jacob would transform, judging from the way he was quivering with rage, so I clutched Bella around her waist, ready to protect her if need be. "Stop it, now," she said to Jacob.

We both watched as Jacob's trembling slowly stopped, though his anger-filled eyes never left mine. Seth continued to growl outside the tent.

_Don__'t do it Jacob_, I heard Seth's words in both their heads, _it's the last thing we need right now. Focus on Bella, she's what this is all about after all._

"Jacob?" Bella ventured to ask, "Are you hurt?"

"Of course not!" He said, insulted. Then Bella turned her disapproving gaze to me.

"That wasn't nice, you should say 'sorry.'"

"You must be joking!" I exploded. "He was crushing you!" I had her best interests at heart, she knew that, didn't she?

"Because you dumped him on the floor! He didn't do it on purpose, and he didn't hurt me." Bella's accusing words, penetrated my, as yet, fury filled mind. I hated the very thought of apologizing to the dog, but I was never one to deny Bella anything.

"My apologies, dog." I managed to say, through gritted teeth.

"No harm done," He replied. _Didn't think you'd do it bloodsucker, blow to your pride, ain't it?_ The jeering edge to his words, riled my anger further, but I controlled it.

Jacob eventually left the tent, much to Bella's rather obvious dismay. Her pain at seeing him leave fuelled my jealousy. Perhaps I wasn't enough, maybe she had enjoyed Jacob against her last night. Why wouldn't she prefer a warm, living, body to my cold, stone-like one? With Jacob, she didn't need to always worry about crossing a line. She didn't have to worry she'd be crushed accidentally.

My thoughts made my blood boil. Bella was _mine,_ I wasn't willing to let her go, not to him.

Once Jacob was out of the tent, I drew her to me, possessively. We didn't speak for a time, making me wonder if she was regretting being with me, instead of the wolf. After some discussion about the rest of my family, Bella turned to me.

"You could tell me about your ten best nights," She said, "I'm curious."

"Try to guess." I said, a smile in my voice. Obviously any night I spent with her would be a candidate.

"There're too many nights I don't know about. A century of them." Bella shook her head. _My silly Bella, as if any of those nights could possibly compare to you._

"I'll narrow it down for you. All of my best nights have happened since I met you."

"Really?" The surprise in her tone was evident.

"Yes, really – and by quite a wide margin, too." I waited to see if she would actually try to guess.

"I can only think of mine," she admitted, ruefully.

"They might be the same," I told her, now curious to see if they would, indeed, match up.

"Well, there was the first night. The night you stayed."

I was happy to hear her mention it, as it had been a wonderful night. I had watched her sleep, marvelling that this fragile human girl trusted me enough to let me stay with her. Hearing her say 'I love you' had lifted me into a place of bliss I hadn't known existed. It had been my rebirth into the man I was now; made better because of her.

"Yes, that's one of mine, too. Of course, you were unconscious for my favourite part."

"That's right. I was talking that night, too." Bella remembered, I felt her heart rate speed up then. Looking down at her, I saw a fierce blush spreading across her cheeks. I was about to ask what was wrong when she spoke again. "What did I say last night?"

What could I tell her? If I told her the truth, it'd only make her feel guilty. I didn't want to burden her with that at a time like this. Instead of answering, I shrugged my shoulders, in an attempt to have her drop the subject. Of course, it didn't work.

"That bad?" She asked, in a small voice.

"Nothing too horrible," I finally said, not wanting to talk about it.

"Please tell me."

"Mostly you said my name, the same as usual."

"That's not bad," she said guardedly, waiting for me to continue.

"Near the end, though, you started mumbling some nonsense about 'Jacob, my Jacob.'" I could hear the raw pain in my voice as I spoke, "Your Jacob enjoyed that quite a lot." I dropped to a whisper.

I could feel Bella's eyes on me, as her lips touched my jaw, but I didn't meet her gaze, afraid of what she would see in my face. I remembered the thrill that had coursed through Jacob when he heard her mutter those words. It'd been impossible to try and block out all his thoughts, not when he was so damned loud about it, and in such close vicinity.

"Sorry, that's just the way I differentiate." Bella told me.

"Differentiate?" Between what? I wondered.

"Between Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Between the Jacob I like and the one who annoys the hell out of me," she explained. Ah, that made some sense. His jealousy made him run hot and cold with her. I was glad he was still such a child.

"Tell me another favourite night," I urged.

"Flying home from Italy." Her response was immediate. I was taken aback, she'd been convinced I was only going to leave again, and it made her top ten? Bella never ceased to surprise me. "Not one of yours?" She asked, when I didn't say anything.

"No, it is one of mine, actually, but I'm surprised it's on your list. Weren't you under the ludicrous impression I was just acting from a guilty conscience, and I was going to bolt as soon as the plane doors opened?" It still hurt to think about that time; to know I'd broken her faith in me so badly that she'd think I couldn't wait to leave her.

"Yes," she smiled at me, "But, still, you were there."

"You love me more than I deserve," I tenderly kissed her head, holding her more closely to me. I'd left her broken, and she'd still welcomed me back, choosing to forget all that had happened in between.

"Next would be the night after Italy," she went on with her list.

"Yes. That's on the list. You were so funny."

"Funny?"

"I had no idea your dreams were so vivid. It took me forever to convince you that you were awake." The memory made me smile, though it was laced with some bitterness. Bella's inability to believe I was really there, had only highlighted how deeply I had hurt her by leaving.

"I'm still not sure. You've always seemed more like a dream than reality. Tell me one of yours, now. Did I guess your first place?"

I knew Jacob was outside the tent, listening to our conversation with extreme distaste. He had returned from La Push a few minutes ago.

_Well, this is what you get for eavesdropping._ I thought to myself, choosing my answer deliberately.

"No – that would be two nights ago, when you finally agreed to marry me." It was true, but unworthy of me to state so clearly. If Bella would let me, I'd sing about our upcoming nuptials from the rooftops.

_He__'s just saying that to get a rise out of me,_ Jacob tried to tell himself.

I heard Jacob's momentary disbelief, and kept a watch on his reactions.

Bella was frowning.

"That doesn't make your list?" I asked her.

"Yes…it does. But with reservations. I don't understand why it's so important to you. You already had me forever."

_No! She agreed? She__'s going to marry that vampire? Is she crazy?_ Jacob's thoughts screamed at me.

"A hundred years from now, when you've gained enough perspective to really appreciate the answer, I will explain it to you." It was getting difficult to keep up the conversation with the wolf's strong reactions intruding on my mind.

"I'll remind you to explain – in a hundred years." Bella informed me, causing more distress to the being outside the tent.

_I can__'t take it. She can't mean it. She loves me too, I know it, I can sense it, even if she can't. I can't lose her, not before she admits it to herself. Motherf**king vampire'll only hurt her in the end. _

I felt Jacob's acute pain, nearly feeling sorry for him. I'd be just as much of a wreck if I had to hear Bella had agreed to marry another man.

_Goddamn it! She__'s made the worst decision of her life. Why did he have to come back? God it hurts. I can't listen to anymore! _I followed Jacob's thoughts, reading his intention to get away from here; to be anywhere but here.

"Are you warm enough?" I asked, abruptly.

"I'm fine, why?" Bella asked, confused about my sudden subject change. Before I could respond, Jacob's piercing, pain-filled howl sounded outside the tent.

I saw Bella face shift from shock, to realization, then to pain and guilt. We both heard Jacob's howl cut off into a sob, then silence descended once again. He had run off, unable to stomach our close proximity any longer.

"Because your space heater has reached his limit. Truce over," I said softly.

"Jacob was listening," Bella whispered.

"Yes."

"You knew."

"Yes." There was no point to lying. She knew I could read minds. Bella stared into the tent wall, unseeing. Guilt was written clearly on her now-troubled features. I started to question the validity of my actions. I hadn't intended to cause Bella pain, only to show Jacob who Bella had chosen. I wanted him to see, unequivocally, that I was the one Bella loved. It was an immature gesture, and that, admittedly, was beneath me.

"I never promised to fight fair," I said quietly, "And he deserves to know." I reasoned that I would want to know should Bella choose someone else. Though perhaps not in this fashion.

I watched Bella bury her head in her hands, and her noticeable distress added to my unease. I had made the wrong decision to talk about our engagement with Jacob just outside. The last thing I had wanted to do was hurt Bella.

I wondered if I would ever stop hurting the one I loved most. She deserved better than me.

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**A/N: It has been a looong week for me, even though it was only a 4-day work week. I'm just getting back into writing mode. **


	7. Pages 531 to 536

_**Hello, it's been awhile since my last update! I'm on holidays at the moment so I'm hoping to catch up on my writing.**_

_**I'm following pages 531 – 536 of Eclipse.  
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_**I don't own Twilight.**_

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**Possession – Part 7**

I was waiting for Bella to return from chasing after Jacob. Being restless, I'd wandered out of the tent, unable to sit still. I wondered how my family was faring, as well as the wolf pack. As much as I wanted to be with them, Bella's wants were my first priority. If she needed me to be with her then that's where I would be.

Now, if only I knew where she was.

Idly, I picked up pebbles and watched as they were pulverized into dust between my fingers. Then, all at once, Bella's scent assailed my senses. I followed the scent back to the tent where I found her, facedown, on the sleeping bag.

What had happened? Was she hurt? Had that dog done something to upset her?

Quietly, I went up to her and gently stroked her long hair. She jumped at my touch.

"Are you alright?" I asked, worried.

"No," she sounded dull, "I want to die." My lips tightened at that. My mind was in turmoil, just what had transpired while she was gone?

"That will never happen. I won't allow it," I told her.

"You might change you mind about that," she whispered.

"Where's Jacob?" I asked, it was unlike him to not take an opportunity to be around Bella.

"He went to fight," she said, somewhat incoherently, still refusing to meet my gaze.

Seth was still outside the tent, and he had heard our conversation. In automatic response to our words, his mind went back to what had occurred between Jacob and Bella.

Unwanted images flashed before my eyes. I heard Jacob threaten to go off and get killed, I saw Bella's desperate attempts to make him stay. The words that put a knife through my unbeating heart, _Kiss me Jacob. Kiss me, and then come back._ I watched Jacob's eager compliance to her request.

My hands clenched when I saw him hold her too tightly, too possessively. Bella was fighting against him, then, abruptly, she was responding to him. They kissed with a passion that could never exist between us. I felt Jacob's triumph at finally having Bella admit he was right, she did love him too. I had suspected as much but to have it confirmed, was like walking through fire.

"Oh," I finally said. Bella looked up at me, but the images were still going through my mind. Fearing the worst, she turned her eyes back to the floor.

Despite the anger I felt at Jacob's blatant manipulation of Bella, I had to laugh. Jacob had accused me of having too many advantages, it seemed there was no boundary he was unwilling to cross.

"And I thought I fought dirty," I remarked. "He makes me look like the patron saint of ethics." I lightly brushed my hand against her cheek as I added, "I'm not mad at you, love. Jacob's more cunning than I gave him credit for. I do wish you hadn't asked him, though."

"Edward," Bella's voice was breaking, "I…I, I'm…"

"Shh," I quieted her, realizing she mistook my meaning. "That's not what I meant. It's just that he would've kissed you anyway – even if you hadn't fallen for it – and now I don't have an excuse to break his face. I would have really enjoyed that, too." I perhaps put too much emphasis on the last few words. It was true, I really would've liked to punch Jacob squarely in the face.

I could've told him that forcing Bella to face her feelings would only hurt her more. I saw the confusion and guilt that was tearing at her. I couldn't be angry with her, she'd had no idea that she even felt that way towards him. I was, however, furious with the dog. _I don't care that she does love you, you should be punished for making her so upset._

"Why aren't you angry with me?" Bella asked. "Why don't you hate me? Or haven't you heard the whole story yet?" She looked at me warily.

"I think I got a fairly comprehensive look. Jacob makes vivid mental pictures. I feel almost as bad for his pack as I do for myself." Outside I could hear Seth's affirmative growl. _Amen to that!_

Bella only sagged farther into the sleeping bag, obviously hating herself for everything that had happened.

"You're only human, Bella. And, as much as I might wish otherwise, so is he. There are holes in your life that I can't fill. I understand that." _But I hope with everything I am, that you choose me over him._

"But that's not true. That's what makes me so horrible. There are no holes." She protested.

"You love him," I stated, forcing the words out of my mouth. I needed to be fair; she did love him.

"I love you more," she said. I knew this, but it didn't necessarily mean she would choose to stay with me. If she didn't love me above Jacob, she wouldn't have been so blind to how she truly felt about him.

"Yes, I know that, too. But…when I left you Bella, I left you bleeding. Jacob was the one to stitch you back up again. That was bound to leave its mark – on both of you," I paused to take a breath, "I can't blame either of you for something I made necessary." _Forgive me, Bella, for entertaining the notion that we could live without each other. _How I wished I could take it all back and save her the hurt she was experiencing now.

A vision went through my mind, _Alice_. Victoria and her army of newborns were approaching. Alice's vision was clear, there was no doubt that we would win, but the specifics were still hazy. _We're fine Edward_, her mental voice was faint, _Just getting ready, they'll be here any minute now. _

"It's getting close," Bella said.

"Yes, a few more minutes now. Just enough time to say one more thing…"

Bella was looking at me with trepidation, as she waited for me to continue.

"I can be noble Bella. I'm not going to make you choose between us. Just be happy, and you can have whatever part of me you want, or none at all, if that's better. Don't let any debt you feel you owe me influence your decision." I meant every word I said. There wasn't anything I wanted more than her happiness, even if it spelled misery for me. If she wanted to be with Jacob, then I wouldn't stand in her way. Perhaps, it would even be better if she did choose Jacob. She could have a normal life, free of threats like Victoria. He could give her things I never would be able to.

_Make the decision and I'll be able to let you go. _At least I hoped I'd be strong enough to let her go.

To my surprise, Bella chose that moment to turn spitfire.

"Dammit, stop that!" She shouted at me. I was bewildered, did she think I was trying to placate her?

"No – you don't understand. I'm not trying to make you feel better, Bella, I really mean it." _Please believe me._

"I know you do! What happened to fighting back? Don't start with the noble self-sacrifice now! Fight!" She was on her knees now, glaring at me.

"How?" What did she want me to do? Go out there and tear Jacob from limb to limb? As much as I wanted to, it would only cause more pain for her.

Bella launched herself at me. Before I knew it, her arms were around my neck, and she was sitting in my lap.

"I don't care that it's cold here. I don't care that I stink like a dog right now. Make me forget how awful I am. Make me forget him. Make me forget my own name. Fight back!" She didn't give me a chance to respond as she crushed her mouth against mine.

I could feel the desperation in her kiss, in the way her hands clutched feverishly at my hair. This wasn't right.

"Careful, love," I murmured against her mouth.

"No." She tried to resume the kiss but I pushed her back so I could look at her. Her eyes were tortured, showing me she wasn't thinking clearly.

"You don't need to prove anything to me." I told her.

"I'm not trying to prove something. You said I could have any part of you I wanted. I want this part. I want every part." With that proclamation, Bella resumed her attack of my mouth.

The animalistic part of me wanted to give in and claim her as my own. If we succumbed now, it would be something Jacob could never take away from me. But I knew it'd be for all the wrong reasons. It'd be solely out of reaction to the day's events. I'd regret it and, worse, Bella would regret it.

I took Bella's arms from around me, pushing her back firmly.

"Perhaps this isn't the best moment for that," I said. Bella immediately dropped her arms in defeat.

"Why not?" She huffed.

"Firstly, because it is cold." I bent down to gather the sleeping bag and wrapped it around her shoulders.

"Wrong. First, because you are bizarrely moral for a vampire." I chuckled; I couldn't deny it.

"All right, I'll give you that. The cold is second. And thirdly…well, you do actually stink, love." Jacob's scent was, indeed, all over her, but that was more of an excuse than anything. "Fourthly, we _will _try, Bella. I'll make good on my promise. But I'd much rather it wasn't in reaction to Jacob Black." _God knows you're tempting enough to make me want to fulfill my promise now, but it's not the time. _That was, of course, assuming that she chose to stay me over Jacob.

She winced then, and buried her face in my shoulder.

"And fifthly…"

"This is a very long list," Bella commented.

"Yes, but did you want to listen to the fight or not?" As if on cue, Seth gave a piercing howl outside the tent. The sound of it even made me stiffen, much as Bella had beside me.

The fight was beginning.

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**A/N: Reviews make me happy and want to write (ie update) more quickly. Show me some love!**


	8. Pages 605 to 611

_**Thanks to those of who reviewed! I appreciate every one I get! This is probably going to be the second last chapter I'll write for Eclipse. **_

_**I've skipped over a bit, so apologies to those who are frustrated by my jumping around. I find it's best to write about what you're interested in and the parts I omit aren't as interesting to me. :P This is also un-betaed so bear with my errors! I did self-edit it.  
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_**I'm following pages 605 – 611. (After the fight and after Bella visits an injured Jacob)**_

_**I don't own Twilight or Eclipse, though I wish I did.**_

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**Possession – Part 8**

I knew where Bella was headed and I fought to keep from trailing her there. She needed this time with him, I told myself. Jacob deserved that time too, he'd been injured quite badly in the fray with Victoria.

I flipped through the day's events in my mind. The fight with Victoria; Bella watching as I beheaded her; my astonishment that this still did nothing to quell her view of me. I'd demonstrated, in no uncertain terms, that I was an accomplished killer. She'd shrugged it off, telling me her only fear had been for my safety.

My unpredictable Bella, who still managed to surprise me even after all this time.

What was she doing over there with him? Was he trying to convince her that he was the better choice? Would she finally see sense and decide that I was no longer good enough for her? I went through various possible scenarios in my head, all of which ended with Bella choosing the wolf. It made me cringe, but if that made her happy then I would accept it.

Sitting at home wasn't doing much to calm me down. I paced the floor tirelessly as I waited for Bella to return home.

_Edward_, Alice's mental voice called out to me. _She's going to pull over on the road leading back from Jacob's house. She's not doing too well, take good care of her_. I gleaned Bella's exact location from Alice's mental picture. Her thoughts faded out as I tore down the stairs and out the door.

The trees were a blur of green as I raced towards Bella. I was fast, even for a vampire, but I still felt like I wasn't reaching her quickly enough.

Finally, I saw the unmistakable orange truck, sitting just where Alice had seen it. Bella was slumped over the wheel, her head buried in her arms. Her whole body was shaking with the force of her sobs. It pained me to see her hurting so much.

I opened the passenger side door, reached out and gathered her frail form into my arms. She fell against me but started to cry harder, which caused me some alarm. I had never seen Bella cry like this and it made me wonder if she had made the right choice. Would she cry this hard in Jacob Black's arms?

I was silent while she sobbed; we stayed in the same position until Bella started saying Charlie's name.

"I need to go home – Charlie will be worried," she managed to say.

"Are you really ready to go home?" I asked, not wanting to bring her back in this condition.

"Y-yes. I can't stay here. And – and I'm not going to stop this anytime soon."

"Okay, Bella. Let me drive you." There was no way I was going to let her drive, and she didn't protest.

My usual love of speed was gone, not that Bella's truck could have withstood it anyway. I drove slowly, trying to give her time to calm down, all the while keeping an arm close around her. I could tell she was making an effort to stop, to be strong for Charlie. Towards the end of the ride, her sobs had subsided, though her cheeks remained wet with tears.

Once at the house, I helped her out of the truck, looking at her with concern.

"Wait for me upstairs," she muttered. I didn't want to leave her, but I knew Charlie wouldn't welcome the sight of me. Pressing her close against me, I kissed the top of her head and headed in the direction of her bedroom window. Scaling the tree easily, I entered her bedroom and waited. Charlie's thoughts reverberated in my head.

_Wha...? She's crying! What the hell's happened? Has Jacob taken a turn for the worse? _

"What happened to you?" I heard him ask, worry clear in his voice.

"Nothing, Dad. I...just had to talk to Jacob about...some things that were hard. I'm fine." Bella replied.

_She's gone and rejected Jake for that Cullen kid. How many times do I have to tell her he's not worth it? He left her and we had to pick up the pieces. Damn kid's nothing more than a monster._

I looked up into Bella's mirror, and saw a cold marble statue staring back. _Charlie, I couldn't agree more._

After a few more exchanges, I heard Bella mount the stairs. She came in, tears streaming down her face. I saw her hand go to the bracelet on her wrist, her fingers shook as she tried to undo it.

"No, Bella," I said as I clasped her hands in mine. "It's part of who you are."

Despite her love for Jacob, she had chosen me. That bracelet was given to her out of love, and he wouldn't have loved her if it wasn't for me leaving in the first place. All of this was my fault, his pain, her pain. My own had no place here.

I drew Bella into my arms and down onto her bed. She didn't try to keep quiet; her agony needed an outlet.

The night wore on and Bella's sobs continued, unabated. At times she would start to quiet down but then it would start again, becoming hysterical. I felt completely useless, only able to offer her my presence as comfort. And I wasn't sure if I was all that comforting. Maybe it wasn't my presence that she wanted.

I began to wonder if she had made the wrong choice, the amount of suffering was too much. Perhaps she'd be happier with Jacob, and I wanted her to be happy. If I couldn't provide that then I didn't deserve to be with her.

Eventually Bella cried herself to sleep, but it was fitful. I held her as she slept, watching as her brows remained furrowed, as if she were in physical pain. It was a mark of her fatigue that she didn't speak in her sleep at all this night.

I listened to Bella's even breathing and watched the rising sun slowly light up the room. I could see her eyes were going to be swollen from the crying, so I lightly pressed my fingers to them, in an attempt to relieve the discomfort.

As sunshine poured in through the windows, Bella's eyes fluttered open. I watched her carefully as she blinked, then turned to meet my worried gaze.

"Hey," she said, her voice hoarse. I didn't reply, waiting to see if she'd start crying again.

"No, I'm fine," she tried to assure me. "That won't happen again." I must have looked as anxious as I felt for she continued, "I'm sorry you had to see that. That wasn't fair to you."

I couldn't believe that Bella was fretting about being fair to me. Certainly seeing her cry wasn't easy but I accepted it as my punishment for ever leaving her. In my - and Charlie's - opinion, I'd gotten off far too lightly.

I cupped her face gently between my hands. Even with the tear-stains and swollen eyes, she was still beautiful.

"Bella...are you sure? Did you make the right choice? I've never seen you in so much pain ---" I broke off then, unable to keep talking. I would be able to bear it if she told me she _had _made the wrong choice. I would gladly bear anything to take the look of anguish from her eyes.

Something flickered in her face and she brought her fingertips to touch my lips.

"Yes."

"I don't know. If it hurts you so much, how can it possibly be the right thing for you?"

"Edward, I know who I can't live without." Bella was looking directly at me. Still, I remained unconvinced. I'd never seen anyone so broken before.

"But..." I was cut off by Bella shaking her head.

"You don't understand. You may be brave enough or strong enough to live without me, if that's what's best. But I could never be that self-sacrificing. I have to be with you. It's the only way I can live."

Her words were what I wanted to hear, but I knew that she could be very self-sacrificing. Was it something she was doing now? Telling me what she thought I wanted to hear?

Bella looked searchingly into my face before she gestured to her nightstand.

"Hand me that book, will you?" She asked, pointing over my shoulder. I saw her battered copy of Wuthering Heights sitting by itself. I picked it up and passed it to her.

"This again?" I queried, wondering why she was bringing this up again.

"I just wanted to find this one part I remembered...to see how she said it." Bella flipped through the pages, stopping at a particularly dog-eared section. "Cathy's a monster, but there were a few things she got right," she cleared her throat before she began to read, "'If all else perished, and he remained, I should still continue to be; and if all else remained, and he were annihilated, the universe would turn to a mighty stranger.'"

Bella stopped there, closing the book. "I know exactly what she means. And I know who I can't live without." She was looking at me meaningfully.

I took the book from her, tossing it lightly across the room.

"Heathcliff had his moments too," I leaned towards her and whispered, "I _cannot_ live without my life! I _cannot_ live without my soul!"

"Yes," Bella said. "That's my point."

"Bella, I can't stand for you to be miserable. Maybe..." I don't even know what I was going to suggest, anything to have her smile again.

"No, Edward." She said, anticipating me. "I've made a real mess of things, and I'm going to have to live with that. But I know what I want and what I need...and what I'm going to do now."

At last, I allowed myself to fully believe her. Bella wanted me, despite what that future would entail. She was choosing me over being human, over her family and friends. I knew that, this time, her decision came with the knowledge of exactly what she'd be giving up. It made my love for her even stronger, if that was possible.

"What are _we_ going to do now?" I asked, changing her pronoun to include myself. A hint of a smile crossed her face. My body felt lighter at seeing that smile. I loved her so much, it was gratifying to realize that she returned my love.

"We are going to go see Alice."

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**A/N: I think the last part I'll do is after they speak with Alice, when they're at the meadow. It's one of my favourite exchanges in the book! Thanks for reading.**


	9. Pages 615 to 620

**Hi and welcome to the last chapter for my re-telling of Eclipse. I enjoyed writing this one a lot! (I think because of the, er, activities going on at the meadow, Edward is sexy) I was thinking of actually doing one part from Jacob's POV. I'd post it as an 'extra' to this story.  
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**Thanks to everyone who's reviewed! Especially those of you who faithfully reviewed each chapter, you rock!**

**I'm following pages 615 - 620. Forgive my punctuation errors, as I've kept this story beta-less.  
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**I don't own Twilight or Eclipse, I just like to get into Edward's head.**

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**Possession – Part 9**

I was concentrating on Bella's face, wondering why she had just corralled Alice into coordinating an event she'd previously found to be such a burden. Why the sudden change of heart? She only looked back at me with her usual expression of love and, I still found this amazing, trust.

My frustration at being blocked from her thoughts reached new heights. I needed to know what she was thinking. I needed to tell her that what she wanted was paramount. My needs were secondary, as they always should have been.

"Let's get out of here," I said abruptly. "Let's go to our meadow." I was fairly certain it was a suggestion Bella wouldn't turn down. She seemed surprised at the idea.

"I guess I don't have to hide out anymore, do I?"

"No. The danger is behind us." Reassured, Bella nodded and I bent down so she could climb onto my back.

We didn't speak much as I ran swiftly through the forest. It was cloudy, but temperate. A usual day for Forks.

Once at the meadow, Bella hopped down, smiling as she took in the familiar surroundings. She lay down on the damp grass, content to relax among the flowers. I lay down next to her, taking her hand as I did so.

"August thirteenth?" I asked, after a few minutes.

"That gives me a month till my birthday. I didn't want to cut it too close," she explained. I had thought it'd be for some such reason. She was still determined to be changed, only now I was no longer trying to dissuade her. I'd made an agreement and I intended to see it through.

If she loved me enough to give up her human life and join me, then the least I could do was acquiesce to her wishes. I still had a hard time admitting that, deep down, it was my wish too. Though the idea of leaving her souless still didn't sit well with me.

"Esme is three years older than Carlisle – technically. Did you know that?" I looked at her. Bella shook her head. "It hasn't made any difference to them." I wanted to let her know that she could take her time, or stay human if she chose. It wouldn't make my love for her any less.

"My age is not really that important. Edward, I'm ready. I've chosen my life - now I want to start living it." She was very calm. I could tell she was serious, and meant exactly what she said.

"The guest list veto?" I asked, stroking her dark hair.

"I don't care really, but I...I'm not sure if Alice would feel the need to invite...a few werewolves. I don't know if...Jake would feel like...like he should come. Like that's the right thing to do, or that I'd get my feelings hurt if he didn't. He shouldn't have to go through that." A look of guilt passed over her face.

I hated that she felt guilty, when the guilt was all mine. I hated that she still suffered because of me. I didn't mind the idea of having Jacob at the wedding. I would've wanted the same courtesy extended to me.

I stared at her face, trying to discover the real reason Bella had agreed to have an actual wedding. Was it solely to please me? It would be so like her, ignoring her own wants to gratify mine.

She only smiled lovingly at me, which didn't provide the answer I needed. Impulsively, I grabbed her around the waist, pulling her so that she was lying against my chest.

"Tell me why you're doing this, Bella. Why did you decide, now, to give Alice free reign?"

"It wouldn't be fair to keep Charlie out of this. And that means Renee and Phil. I might as well let Alice have her fun too. Maybe it will make the whole thing easier for Charlie if he gets his proper goodbye," she paused, "At least my mom and dad and my friends will know the best part of my choice, the most I'm allowed to tell them. They'll know I chose you, and they'll know we're together. They'll know I'm happy, wherever I am. I think that's the best I can do for them."

I cupped her face with one hand, searching deep into her eyes. Yes, I concluded, she's still living her life according to what others would want, not what she would want. That wasn't right or acceptable. It had to stop now.

"Deal's off," I declared. Bella's face fell in horror.

"What? You're backing out? No!" She cried, clearly mistaking my meaning.

"I'm not backing out, Bella. I'll still keep my side of the bargain. But you're off the hook. Whatever you want, no strings attached."

"Why?" Bella's face showed her shock at my 180 degree turn around.

"Bella, I see what you're doing. You're trying to make everyone else happy. And I don't care about anyone else's feelings. I only need you to be happy. Don't worry about breaking the news to Alice. I'll take care of it. I promise she won't make you feel guilty." In my desire to get my meaning across, my words were coming out rather rushed.

"But I – " Bella tried to interrupt. I knew what she was going to say, that she really wanted this, that we couldn't change our minds now. I wasn't having any of it. No more martyrdom for Bella.

"No. We're doing this your way. Because my way doesn't work. I call you stubborn, but look at what I've done. I've clung with idiotic obstinacy to my idea of what's best for you, though it's only hurt you. Hurt you so deeply, time and time again. I don't trust myself anymore." It was true, all of my decisions, that had seemed necessary at the time, ended up backfiring badly. Because of me two innocent people, one being my heart and soul, were hurting. It couldn't continue.

"You can have happiness your way. My way is always wrong. So, we're doing it your way, Bella. Tonight. Today. The sooner the better. I'll speak to Carlisle. I was thinking that maybe if we gave you enough morphine, it wouldn't be so bad. It's worth a try." I grit my teeth, not wanting to think about the pain that the transformation would entail.

Carlisle and I had discussed the use of morphine during transformation. He was of the opinion that it would help. At least it couldn't hurt to try. If I could spare Bella the agony of turning then it would be worth it. I began thinking about where in our home we would do it. Jasper would have to stay away, of course. But Alice would want to be there, and probably Esme would as well.

"Edward, no-" Bella tried to say again, breaking into my planning. She was looking rather anxious after listening to my tirade. _No Bella, I haven't discounted your chief demand. We're going to do this _entirely _your way. _I couldn't deny it was something I wanted, probably even more desperately than she did.

I put a finger on her lips to silence her. "Don't worry, Bella, love. I haven't forgotten the rest of your demands."

I knew how much she wanted this. After that night we spent alone in my house, I'd found myself contemplating it numerous times. I had wanted to do it right, by my standards, and wait until we were married. But, today's world was different and it was what she wanted. Who was I to deny her?

With both apprehension and anticipation, I brought her face to mine, capturing her lips with my own. Her scent washed over me, making venom pool in my mouth. I kept my lips firmly closed, as I moved them over hers. She was so very warm in my arms; I relished the feel of her against me.

I could feel her heart rate pick up as I threaded my hands into her hair. Bella gripped my arms, pushing herself more closely to me, as she responded to my kiss with passion.

As I became accustomed to having her scent so close to me, I kissed her with growing fervour. Despite my reservations about making love to her as a human, this felt right. Our bodies melded together in a perfect fit and I loved her. Perhaps she was right, it would be physically impossible for me to hurt her because of that love.

Feeling the need rising within me, I rolled us over so that Bella's was lying with her back to the ground, making sure I wouldn't crush her under my weight. The kiss became more insistent, and I could hear Bella's heart racing in her chest. God help me, but I wanted her. I would have to be very careful to keep myself under control, and she was making that a difficult task.

Bella broke the kiss, gasping for air. I took the opportunity to move my lips down her jaw to her neck. Propped up on one hand, I brought the other up to lightly caress her from her ribcage to her hip.

"Stop, Edward. Wait." Bella was breathless, her voice faint. Stop? This was new. Usually I was the one who had to force her to stop.

"Why?" I murmured into her throat, continuing to kiss her exposed skin.

"I don't want to do this now." Her tone was stronger. Silly girl, she was probably still worried about my need. What she couldn't seem to understand was that I needed her, _all_ of her.

"Don't you?" I asked, knowingly. Trying to show her I meant it about meeting her demands, I brought my lips back to hers, rendering her speechless. I could feel her body becoming warmer under my hands which only made the need within me greater. Similar to the time she'd nearly won over my control, sensations were overtaking me, stronger than before.

Bella's hands moved to my chest, but not for the reason I initially thought. With all her strength, she pushed at me. Knowing she didn't have the strength to really push me, I moved back, nearly growling with frustration. Her brown eyes were dilated with passion, her breathing erratic. Clearly she wanted this, so why was she insisting we stop?

"Why?" I repeated. "I love you. I want you. Right now." Instead of responding, she only stared at me, desire plainly written in her face. Taking that as a signal to continue, I resumed kissing her with more abandon as my craving for her grew.

"Wait, wait," she said, trying to talk around my lips.

"Not for me," I murmured, kissing the corner of her mouth.

"Please?" She sounded desperate. I couldn't help the groan that escaped me, as I pushed myself away from her. My body was screaming in protest as I rolled onto my back. _What does she want now?_

I fought to keep from grabbing her, and kissing her inhibitions away. Keeping my hands by my sides, I focused on calming myself down. It wasn't easy with her lying beside me. Not to mention I could still feel her warmth on my skin.

"Tell me why not, Bella," I demanded. "This had better not be about me." _If it is, I will show you just how much I've changed my mind._

"Edward, this is very important to me. I am going to do this right."

"Who's definition of right?" I asked, suspiciously.

"Mine."

I shifted onto my side so I could look at her. I was doubtful about what she meant.

"_How_ are you going to do this right?"

"Responsibly," she said after taking a deep breath. "Everything in the right order. I will not leave Charlie and Renee without the best resolution I can give them. I won't deny Alice her fun, if I'm having a wedding anyway. And I will tie myself to you in every human way, before I ask you to make me immortal. I'm following all the rules Edward. Your soul is far, far too important to me to take chances with. You're not going to budge me on this."

Unfortunately, her answer made sense, except for the part about my soul. I still wasn't sure if I agreed with Carlisle or Bella on that. If she wanted to do right by Charlie and Renee, I could hardly disagree. A part of me still wanted to make her mine, then and there.

"I'll bet I could," I said in a low voice, focusing all my charm onto her.

"But you wouldn't," Bella said, her voice unsteady again. "Not knowing that this is what I really need."

"You don't fight fair," I accused, wondering if it was any easier for her to shut off her body's wants.

"Never said I did," she smiled, prompting my return grin.

"If you change your mind..." I trailed off suggestively; half hoping she would decide to make love now, despite everything she'd just said.

"You'll be the first to know," she promised.

The clouds that had been hovering over us started dropping rain. Bella glared at them, and I couldn't blame her. It wasn't a welcome interruption.

"I'll get you home," I said, wiping droplets of water from Bella's face.

"Rain's not the problem," she muttered. "It just means that it's time to go do something that will be very unpleasant and possibly even highly dangerous."

Completely baffled as to what she could mean, I took it for the worst. Was there a new threat that I wasn't aware of? Wasn't it time for us to have some relief?

"It's a good thing you're bulletproof," she continued. "I'm going to need that ring. It's time to tell Charlie." She looked so put upon, I couldn't help laughing.

"Highly dangerous," I agreed, reaching into the pocket of my jeans for her engagement ring. "But at least there's no need for a side trip." I'd retrieved it when Alice was showing her the wedding gown.

I took Bella's left hand and slid the ring easily onto the third finger. It still gave me a thrill to see it there. My ring, my Bella. Looking at her I could see that, this time, my joyful expression was mirrored on her face. This time, it was what _she_ wanted. Bella moved her hand from side to side, admiring the gleam of the jewels before meeting my gaze again.

"I love you Edward," she said, emotion making her voice thick. Bending down, I kissed her softly before murmuring into her ear,

"And I love you. For all eternity."

* * *

**A/N: There you have it! Thanks for reading. Any takers for me to do Breaking Dawn? I'm just asking...**


	10. Author's Note Sorry!

**Sorry, sorry! I hate getting A/Ns instead of an actual update too, but this one is to let you know I've posted a new story called: ****Resurrection, featuring selected parts of Breaking Dawn from Edward's point of view!**

**This also completes my trilogy of titles all ending with "ion". Ha ha!**

**Please go to my profile page to check it out!  
**

**Cheers,**

**AMayes**


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